Black

In light, black is the absence of colour. In pigment, it’s all colours mixed together. Either way black represents space, the infinite, never-ending, all-encompassing. It is dark and mysterious, and symbolizes mourning and evil in Western cultures. In clothing, an all-black outfit can be goth or elegant, depending on styling. Black is the easiest neutral to work with because it goes with absolutely everything. It is safe, and no-fault, while simultaneously evoking power and sophistication.

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I tend to gravitate towards colour more than neutrals but obviously neutrals have their place in any wardrobe, and I certainly have more black than any other neutral, as most people probably do. I used to shun black because I’m so pale and I worried that it would make me look sickly but I’ve been assured that I look good in this darkest of shades, and so have allowed more black to creep into my closet. I’m still hesitant to fully embrace it though and will never wear an outfit that is entirely black, as it’s just not me. I will also admit that I find relying on black too heavily rather paradoxically comes across as lazy, or try-hard, again depending on styling. Not that I’m anti-goth mind you. I’ve always loved the goth style, because it’s so deliberate and directed. I love it when anyone fully commits to a look, regardless of what that look is. I even dyed my (naturally blonde) hair black once, in an effort to be more edgy, and let’s just say I soon learned the pain of bleach, because that was one hair colour I could not pull off.

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I will say though, that I’m quite glad we’ve reached a place in electronics where black is the default, rather than beige. Yes, I’m old enough to remember when all computers were beige for some reason. I’ve also discovered, while putting together my black colour boards, that black is pretty ubiquitous in workout gear as well. I guess it’s just not manly to lift in any other colour.

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But when it comes to accessories, and home decor, you can’t go wrong with black. Many interior designers will say that every room needs a bit of black to anchor the space. I don’t disagree. While I veer towards bright colours in my home as well as my wardrobe, I like dark accents, and have decorated my condo thusly. Black is classic, but equally modern. Let’s face it, if all the colours were to fight for dominance, black would win.

Brown

Brown is a neutral, and in terms of pigment can be created by mixing two complementary colours. I usually make brown by mixing red and green, so brown is like Christmas, in that you take the shiny, apparently joyful aspects of the holiday, and mix them together to end up with absolute shit.

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I kid, I don’t hate Christmas nor brown. Black gets all the love in terms of popular neutrals, but brown is underrated. Brown can be quite serviceable when you need a neutral to break up an outfit but feel that black would be too harsh. Brown is much warmer than both black and white, and grey for that matter. I find brown to be particularly effective with blue, and it can also work nicely with pink, but it’s probably best to keep it away from orange, lest you look too ’70s, unless that’s what you’re going for, and if it is, respect.

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When I was conceiving of my brown colour boards I thought I would struggle to find brown objects around the house, believing that since I love colour so much, it’d be hard to find much of the neutral. But brown is everywhere. I’ve got way more brown shoes than any other colour, and plenty of brown fabrics, and trinkets, and furniture. Brown is everywhere! Though curiously, as I was scouting the outside world I found that trees, at least in Montreal, actually appear more grey than the stereotypical brown. Still, brown is associated with nature, just as green is, because it’s the colour of wood (supposedly?) and dirt, and the aforementioned shit. And even though it’s also the colour of chocolate, a lot of people dislike brown. I know a few people who are so anti-brown that I actually feel weird wearing it in front of them. But ultimately their hate is their problem, not mine, so I shall wear brown proudly and shake my brown-clad butt in their faces if they don’t like it!

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Burgundy

According to the almighty internet, burgundy is a reddish brown, and maroon is a brownish red. So this shade is halfway between the boldest colour on the spectrum and the muddiest neutral. I must confess that while I don’t dislike any colour, burgundy is far from my favourite. Perhaps I find it a bit tough to work with because it can’t decide if it’s a colour or a neutral.

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I firmly believe that any colour can work with any other colour as long as you pick the right tones, but colours also appear different in various settings, depending on lighting, so an outfit that looks fine at home could be jarring at work. This is where burgundy can be tricky. You might think you’re wearing a sedate and professional blazer only to enter a room with florescent lighting and realize you’re a bright beacon of ridiculousness. But why not be ridiculous?

So maybe I take issue with burgundy because it’s like a red that couldn’t commit. It’s red that rolled around in the mud, because it didn’t want to stand out in a crowd. It wants to play it safe, but still be bold, rich, and opulent. Burgundy is so smug, ’cause it gets to have it both ways. Burgundy and navy should get together and start a band, called the colourful neutrals, and they can roam the urban landscape, being utterly inoffensive and work appropriate.

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So by now you’re guessing that I shun burgundy in my wardrobe. But no, I’ve got tons of it. After all, sometimes you need to be inoffensive and work appropriate while still privately enjoying that you’ve got some red in you.